You’ve fallen hard for this guy, but he just doesn’t feel the same way. In fact, he tells you that he’s not ready, is unavailable, or that he just wants to be FRIENDS! Of course, you know better, and you’re wondering what it is that you have to do to make this guy finally fall for you.
I’ll tell you right now, that it’s simpler than you think…all you have to do is UNDERSTAND a man’s mind and how it works, and then you’ll have everything you need to make him become available and interested in you. Follow these 7 tips to understand exactly what it is that you need to do to make an “unavailable” and “disinterested” guy available and interested in you….
#1. Climb the social ladder – Right now you’re not that popular (in his mind), and even if you are, you’re not in the right “social” state for him to want to date you.That’s because socially, you turn him off…he doesn’t really look at you as someone he would see himself hanging around.
This is why you need to climb the social ladder, and become like the types of people he CAN see himself engaging with…and the types of people he’d be PROUD to court around. It helps to become acquainted with the people he knows or likes, so that you can learn to act more like them, and so that you can learn what it is that this man looks for in a friend or acquaintance.
Also, when you do this, you give him the chance to notice you more; and when he sees that his friends are confident to talk to you or hang out with you, he will get the impression that you’re someone he could hang around as well.
The social ladder also extends to your work and school, where you gain the respect and trust of your superiors so that they talk well of you and use you as an example…which in turn makes him impressed with you and gets him to notice you more.
When people are “socially” happy and interested in you, it gives him a SOLID reason to want to be interested as well. Not only this, but a man will desire a woman who is publicly “liked” and desired by others.
If he notices that people generally like you more than other women, this will naturally make him attracted, because it means that other people see potential in you…and that you have something to offer.
#2. Be cocky – What’s in it for him if you’re simply too easy and would cling on to his arm in a heartbeat?There’s nothing interesting, useful, or attractive about a woman who simply would chase a man and beg him to date her.
BUT, a woman who is cocky, knows she is great (and doesn’t settle for less), and doesn’t hand over her attention and time easily, is the type that really sparks his interest;because that woman is a CHALLENGE and gives him something to work for.
It’s challenging to meet a cocky woman, because that woman knows exactly what she wants and gets it…and doesn’t take anything less. It’s ATTRACTIVE, because a man KNOWS that if he impresses a woman with THAT kind of an attitude, that it would mean that he in turn is also great.
Every guy out there wants to feel special and unique…and there’s that will make him feel more amazing than snagging a woman who clearly doesn’t need him, but CHOSE him anyway… because that type of woman, is the kind who wants a man for what he truly is; instead of the type of woman who chases after a guy for everything else like money, attention, emotional support etc…
#3. Kick him out of the benefits zone – He might have told you that he just wants to be friends, so foolishly, you befriend him.Or you are acquainted with him, but let me tell you that he’s simply USING you, and is getting EVERYTHING he wants from you, without even having to commit.
You have absolutely NO benefit from giving him attention, time, perks, help or anything else without him committing or dating you. It’s only HIM who benefits from that.
Don’t let him have the last laugh there, and kick him straight out of the benefits zone so that he ACTUALLY has a reason to come and commit to you and date you. The reason being:if he doesn’t, he gets “NADA…NOTHING…ZILCH!”…and NO man likes rejection.
It’s rejection to him, because you were giving him some perks before, but NOW you are taking it away. Since he knows you have some things he wants (but doesn’t want you enough to date yet), he will instantly try to get you back to get THOSE things back again.
Obviously you have something to offer, but the issue is/was that you gave it to him so readily and easily…thus it made him lose interest in dating you, BUT told him that he could still be friends with you regardless to still get everything.
A man will see NO problems in using a woman, ESPECIALLY if she lets him. This is why it’s important to draw that line and cut him right off…so that he sees your value and APPRECIATES you. Pure rejection of the benefits zone is the only way to go, and he will feel rejected because you’ll be taking away everything he actually liked about you.
Then he will desire you even more, and will wonder what else you have to offer now that he can actually sit down and see what he is missing and didn’t appreciate while he had you.
#4. Show confidence not insecurity – Don’t look down if he passes by and looks at you, instead look him straight in the eye, smile a bit, and then walk past…and most definitely don’t call him 1000 times if he doesn’t respond, because you don’t want to come across as being extremely insecure and needy.
Instead, show confidence, and if he doesn’t call, don’t act like it’s a huge deal, instead act like it means nothing: confidence.
Also, don’t carry yourself in a nervous fashion rather be confident to the extent that he will have no choice but to become impressed. Do this publicly and display your confidence as much as possible to get others talking about you too: good public PR is a fast way to make him desire you.
If you go to the same school, or work at the same place, or pass by the same places daily…make sure that whatever you are doing, if it’s a school project, your job, or simply walking by…that you are showing confidence…and are GOOD at it.
This is why you should improve everything that you do publicly or anything that you would normally do when around him, so that he starts to notice and really takes an interest in you, because YOU would do things differently than other women, and in turn would be interesting to him, because you ACT different and are something new.
#5. Flirt and reject – There’s nothing more confusing and compelling to a man than a woman who flirts one minute but rejects him the very next.
It goes something like this, tell him: “You know…you are really interesting at times but then you also have this real boring side about you which annoys me to bits.
Or:“I only have room for one more contact in my phone. I think I’ll add this guy whose been annoying me lately.”
Or: “I can’t get over the fact that you’re so tall. I used to like it, but now I think maybe you are just too tall for me.”
This tells him that you like him, but at the same time challenges him to PROVE himself to you, because now you are saying he isn’t good enough…and he WILL fall for this trick…because you’re basically saying that he has the potential to be something, BUT right now is not.
Moreover, you boost his ego, and then he starts to get this DEPENDENCE on you to feel good and desired but within seconds you take it away. This leads him to try and get it back, because he realizes that it felt good, and for a moment expected you to compliment him, BUT you didn’t follow through with that expectation, and now his curiosity to find out why is sparked even more.
#6. Make him wonder – Don’t explain yourself to this man, and also don’t become PREDICTABLE.Instead; do things that make him realize he really had you all wrong, and make him think that there is MORE to you than what he originally thought.
Change up your routine and don’t just give him the answers to everything, make him guess…because that kind of curiosity leads a man to actively try to find out the answers, and leads a man to want to figure you out.
This would mean that you have to start doing things he would NEVER expect you to do. If you’re always a goodie two shoes, and “clean” girl…don’t be afraid to appear as though you are ALSO naughty if you want to be, spontaneous…so that he REALLY wonders who you truly are, and starts to try to find out.
It also helps if you use suggestive action and words to make him THINK you’re going to do something, and make him think you’re interested; BUT also make him think that you might not be…which in turn confuses him and makes him try really hard to get the latter of the two answers.
For instance… you could lean in toward him and pretend you’re going to hug him, but instead, grab his shirt and say “oh, there’s hair all over your shirt… you shed worse than my cat!” and laugh. At first he will be thinking you were going to lean in and hug, but now you’re just doing the exact opposite, and not only that but you’re poking fun at him too.
Another example: say that you’re going to call him…and don’t. Now he will be wondering why you said you would, and didn’t…and will want to talk to you even more.
It goes on and on, basically the idea is not to be predictable, and to SUGGEST through a “hot and cold” approach, that makes him always second guess himself, and in turn makes him chase you even more just to try and figure out if you do like him now, and also to figure YOU out.
#7. Learn the art of conversation – What you say has a HUGE impact on the first impression, and HOW you say it has another impact on how you come across to him.Learn to be a smooth talker and understand how it is that you should talk to a man.
For instance, “suggestion” in conversation can do a LOT because it’s not telling him what to do (he won’t feel bossed around), and it allows him to make a CHOICE…and it’s also the best way to persuade a man. An example of this would be if a woman said the following to a guy: “You know, I thought something interesting about you the other day. In fact, ahh…never mind!”.
This type of suggestion would be the kind that tells him you may think or know something about him, but won’t tell him. His curiosity spikes to want to know it now, simply because you never told him…and are giving him the CHOICE to know.
It’s also quite persuading, because he has no idea what it could be, and now wonders even more…because you didn’t really give him too many clues. A man likes to feel in control, and the best way to do that is to SUBTLY suggest things to him, so that he ends up choosing it anyway, and so that he feels like it was his idea all along.
An example of this would be to say something like:
“There’s no good guys in town; all of them are jerks. I’ll just have to stay single to protect myself from all the drama. Besides, I wouldn’t want to date a loser who couldn’t please me!”
This tells him that you may include HIM into that category, which in turn makes him want to find out if you truly do think he’s not a good catch. Since you think there are NO good guys, he will WANT to be the exception now, because you’ve literally just told him that if a guy were to be what you want, that he’d be EXTREMELY special and amazing.
You also challenge him to want to be the guy to please you, because now you are saying that you aren’t easy, and in the end are telling him that you’d be the type of girl who doesn’t just go for any weirdo or loser…and instead reserves herself only for the best of the best.
Once you learn how to talk to a man and use suggestive discussion, you’ll see that he will do what you want, without having to ask…
This in turn always leaves him wondering and interested in you, because you’re not DIRECTLY saying something (and giving him a chance to reject you).
But, this approach INDIRECTLY tells him something, which in turn only gives him the option of either having to accept it (and admit that he’s a poor quality catch), or prove you wrong (which would mean that he has to chase you and impress you now); and he will naturally want the latter of the two: to prove you wrong, so that he can boost his ego and self-esteem.